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Hello!

I recently realised that this blog has been going for 6 almost 7 years! On the 24th of May 2015, I created this blog and shared my first ever post! I am shocked but also thrilled to still be writing and sharing everything on WritingMyHeart. My content has changed over the years, although I have always used this blog as a platform to share my creative writing. 

The support I have received from friends, family, and even strangers online have been overwhelming over the years. The reach on the blog has continued to improve and we are currently sitting at 101K views! I am overjoyed at the success of the page, I couldn't have done it without you. 

To celebrate this amazing occasion, even if it's early I treat myself to a new Parker pen with the blog name engraved!  I am obsessed with it. As a stationery addict, I also treat myself to a new planner from Papier, they're perfect together.  I am so thrilled to still be sharing on this blog, I pour my whole heart into it and will continue to do so. I feel like the blog has come such a long way, it's gone through many changes from content type to the actual layout of the page.  It's come such a long way and I am so grateful to every person who has stumbled on it and read any of my words!

On such an occasion I thought I would share the top 5 posts of my blog according to the stats Blogger has gathered:

  1. BOOK BOX SUBSCRIPTIONS(DECEMBER)
  2. Talking with female serial killers(review)
  3. WHY I’M NO LONGER TALKING TO WHITE PEOPLE ABOUT RACE (REVIEW)
  4. TWO TATTOOS
  5. 2/3
This tells me that you guys enjoy my book reviews and little life updates. This makes me super happy as I am really getting into writing book reviews. I will try and do more life updates but truth be told I work, I write, and I read. I sometimes go places my life isn't the most interesting. 

I noticed holding fourth place is a tattoo update from a couple years ago. I don't often talk about my tattoos on my blog but I do post about them on my Instagram. I am working on slowly building a book sleeve,  maybe I will post an update on that when it's complete or near completion. 

I think it's cool that my top post was on my book box subscription, a few of those posts were close to the top 5, maybe I will restart them again sometimes in the future. 

I am so happy to still be writing on the blog 6 years later, this page is my home! I'm so pleased that you're part of this journey!    

Almost 7 Years of WritingMyHeart

Monday, 10 January 2022

Hello!
I have recently noticed the influx of readers on my blog, and I am so happy to see my words are travelling further than I had ever imagined! I have received more comments in recent months, and people asking for ways to contact me. I have put my email address in the sidebar but I thought I'd made a post to also share all my social media platforms, so you guys can reach out to me. I do reply quite quickly depending the time of day you message!

My business email address: myheartiwrite@gmail.com
My Instagram: WritingMyHeart
My Twitter: Lilmiss_lauren
My YouTube Channel: GeordieSimmer

I am so grateful for every reader, and it makes me happy seeing so many lovely comments. I am starting to get back into a routine posting back on the blog twice a week: Saturday & Wednesday. Click over into the sidebar to follow the blog and subscribe to email notifications for when I update! Thank you for reading, and I'll see you on Wednesday with a fresh new post!  

Where to find me

Saturday, 9 November 2019

It's been a hot minute since my last post, I haven't been writing as much as I'd like to. I am aiming for weekly posts again!

Artificial

Wednesday, 25 September 2019

Summer is coming to an end, and I couldn't be happier!
It means I only have a couple weeks left of working full-time, and University starts again. Summer has been long, I spent most of the Summer working  which lead to lots of time at the pub. I haven't been as creative as I would have liked to be, working sucks the life out of you. I did get a few books read, and I started my Sims YouTube channel - this  is still very productive and I am super proud! Summer was the start of  a new creative outlet.
Pumpkin Spice Lattes' are back and those autumnal feels are hitting me in every direction. Conkers falling from the trees leaves on the floor and the weather is getting colder. Autumn is heading our way and I am ready to snuggle in jumpers watching Hocus Pocus.
This will be my final year in Brighton, this time next year I will be in a whole new city. One year to make the most of this seaside town. I am more than ready for a new adventure.

Hello September > Hello Autumn

Sunday, 1 September 2019

Fully aware I have yet to do a 'normal' my favourites post yet but we will get to that jazz later. I asked last week over on my Instagram if for last week I should post 'Plus Size' or this post. Plus size won but I always intended to make this post at some point so I thought I'd just post it this week. Which may defeat the whole point of the poll but I like to give my readers a choice, if you want to take part in my polls (I've only just recently started doing them) then go and follow my Instagram: WritingMyHeart or click any word that says Instagram on this post and it will (or should) take you straight to my page. Get a vote in what my content for next week should be!

Let's begin!!

Favourite Hogwarts House:
I feel like I really don't need to say it... but I will. My own house of course Slytherin. Fully aware we are cast as the bad house 'There's not a witch or wizard who went bad who wasn't in Slytherin' this is somewhat true. I mean our house animal is a snake... jokes aside. It is the house with a reputation for being bad, which isn't wrong it did produce Voldemort, Snape, Lucious Malfoy, the rest of the death eaters (with the exception of Wormtail but he was pathetic anyway) Bellatrix Lestrange... even the founder what a muggle hating prick. The list goes. Granted it doesn't look good. But all the houses have produced bad witches or wizards. We do have some good witches and wizards from our house: Regulus Black, Tonk's mother Andromeda and well sort of Horace Slughorn, he's a bit iffy but unintentionally. Draco too, I know this is debatable but fight me. Merlin is from Slytherin too. Plus the common room is pretty sick. I could talk all day and say how much I adore Slytherin but I won't. I show house pride, plus at least I'm not a Hufflepuff right?

Favourite Harry Potter Book:
This was a tough one to think about, all of the books have an aspect that I adore. I am always stuck between Prisoner of Azkaban and Order of the Phoenix. Both books are hilarious, and I love them for different reasons but I made the decision of picking Prisoner of Azkaban.  POA I like because you see more of Peeves, and for once see him in a serious manner when he helps Dumbledore locate the fat lady in the portraits. I also loved that Harry got to meet Lupin and Sirius, and finally have more of a real family. Even if one is on the run from escape Azkaban he still makes a better family member than the Dursleys.

Favourite Harry Potter Film:
Prisoner of Azkaban by far! I find the film hilarious, my favourite scene is on the night bus ‘take it away, Earl!!’ It’s just such a good film. I never have a bad word against this film, mainly the missing of Peeves but I’m mad about that in general with the whole series of films. This is also the film where Draco no longer looks like a child: Hallelujah!! I feel like my reasons for liking this film is similar to my reasons for the book. I just feel like things get better for Harry when it comes to his family life, which is always delightful. 

Favourite Hogwarts Haunted:
I couldn’t word this correctly because obviously Hogwarts is haunted by ghosts and as well as a Poltergeist. Peeves is my favourite though. He’s a mischievous character who is a complete dick, and I love it. He is one of the (many) reasons I enjoy the books much more, he’s entertaining and is constantly fucking things up. He’s loveable and annoying. If Peeves had went to screen he would have been played by the late Rick Mail, who I think would have aced it, I loved him in Bottom and Drop Dead Fred. Apparently, they filmed scenes of him playing Peeves but they cut them all... tragic I know. 

Favourite from the Golden Trio:

This is simple: Hermione. An intellegient bad ass woman who loves books? Yes, Queen!

Favourite Hogwarts Headmaster:

Dumbedlore, always Dumbledore. He did endanger a child's life for several years and basically taught the Dark Lord how to control his magic but sure he is still a hell of a guy!

Favourite Couple:

I don't really have one, I think the couples who became a couple were great but there were none I was completely OH MY GOD over. I liked the idea of a gay relationship between Draco and Harry but that is the most commitment I've put into couples as far as they go. 

Favourite Wand:

I currently own Draco's wand but I think next I want to purchase  Hermione's wand. Her wand is stunning!

My favourite Character:

I feel like this is so blatantly obvious. My favourite character is none other than Draco Malfoy. He's been my favourite for as long as I can remember. I know he's an arsehole but I just feel this whole hearted adoration for him. He is troubled, and is ends up getting into things that he doesn't want to. All to impress his father, who I absolutely despise. He is that guy you just want to help!






This was short and sweet, I think. I enjoyed writing about Harry Potter, as always. I will jump at any chance to even discuss Harry Potter, so if you have anything to comment on or agree/disagree with comment below and we can have a chat!  Thank you for reading, and keep an eye on my Instagram to see what I could possibly be posting next Monday!



My Favourites - Harry Potter Edition

Monday, 25 June 2018

This is a little chapter I had written a couple months ago. It was part of a fictional journal I created for the Narrative module on my degree. This piece was inspired by Alice and Wonderland by Lewis Caroll and Cat O' Nine tails by Julia Goulding. It was a fun piece to write and I have decided to share it on here! I am not sure I'll ever carry this piece forward but I did enjoy writing it. 


Coral Ali

It did not take me long to realise that I was not like other girls. Now I look back, all the signs were there. At the age of four at the fancy dress parties, all the girls would come dressed as princesses and I insisted on coming as a pirate. Every single time. I did not care, I loved dressing up as different fictional pirates.  I remember the day trips my parents took me on, I always wanted to visit the beach. I did not care much for dolls, instead I was far more intrigued by boats and treasure.  I had always been fascinated with pirates and the sea, I am still unsure where this fascination has stemmed from but at a young age, I decided I wanted my own ship and to sail the sea with my crew.  I wanted to be a real-life pirate. I got my first job at sixteen, minimum wage at the docks. This was where my pirate days began to come to life. I began helping load cargo, washing down some of the boats that came in every week. It was here where I bet a boy, a boy who later became my best friend and sailing partner. The boy was called Joe Shield, he thought I was mad. We both became apprenticed on the same ship together at the same time, she was called Coral Ali. She was small but a beauty, we were the only apprentices of the owner, Timmy Redding. We didn’t see much of him, he told us what to do and let us get on with it. Joe and I became close quickly, I told him about my dream of owning my own ship and having my crew. Joe wasn’t a very imaginative guy but asked if he could tag along, help me with my crew and to mend the ship if it needed it. His home life was a wreck, and I figured he needed an escape just as much as me.  Together on board of the Coral Ali we learned how to maintain a boat, how to fix any occurring problems. Timmy only taught Joe how to sail though, he did not think it was a girl’s job. He was not a huge fan of me, I think he only hired me because I was the only other person to accept the low pay job alongside Joe. I began to hate Timmy quickly, but I respected him. He would let us travel on the boat with him sometimes, I witnessed him making hundreds of trades. He is a tough man, built well but stern. He would let no man mess him around, and he became my inspiration as a captain. Our dislike for each other fuelled me to work harder, Joe was a good guy, but I managed to further myself as an apprentice quicker than he. I did help him when I could, he was never salty. We both enjoyed each other’s company.  Later Joe taught me to sail, everything Timmy taught him he taught me, I will always be grateful for that. We worked on board of Coral Ali for a good three years, until Timmy went off the rails and crashed her, smashing poor Coral into smithereens. Joe and I were heartbroken. Timmy snapped at us.
“I am done with her, you two do as you please with her remains. Your apprentice is done, we are through,” Timmy had given up and lost all his passion. That hurt my heart. To this today I still could not imagine the heartache of losing your love for something.

Even though we were both upset by the termination of our apprenticeship, we soon found something new. Together we decided it was time to live out my dream, and that’s when we took Timmy’s words with us. We took Coral’s remains, she looked damaged beyond repair. There was no way we could have fixed her, instead, we decided we were going to build a whole new ship entirely. 

Coral Ali

Monday, 21 May 2018


 I have been wanting to create a sim version of Alice for a while now, in this creation I have made her a modern teenager. I enjoy making this quick Sim, I also worked on a quick building. 



I decided to make Alice a little preppy in the screenshots below, I figure we mainly see her in one outfit so I explored other ones. I kept her hair the same throughout just so it resembles Alice somewhat.



I did create several outfits but the two above were my favourites. Below is the build mode I created, I just played around with size. Huge plants, small chairs etc. I really enjoyed this quick creation, I don't think I'll go onto gameplay with her but this as just something quick to do. 



I think my favourite part of this was magnifying the plants to give it a wild forest feel to the build. Have any of you created fictional places from books? I want to create more, but I am not very confident with Build Mode so I am just messing around with creations. I am not sure what I will be working on next but I don't think I will be playing Sims as much as I like to due to upcoming deadlines.

Sim Alice #2 Build Mode

Friday, 13 April 2018

Every once in a while I feel the need for change, and this time I decided to change the layout of my blog. If you haven't noticed already... if you're on a phone you might not see the full change but I am working on phone layout too!  I just feel as though my old layout was getting a bit dull and I just wanted things a bit more lively!  I am living for my new colour scheme, and I have even changed somethings around. I just feel like a refresh really motivates me, it makes me want to write more and work harder on my blog. Instead of posting randomly whenever I feel like it. I am aiming to post weekly, sometimes my brain is just like 'naahh mate I've got nothing for you.' which isn't helpful but it's something I am working on.
I have been working on one of my other pages too.  I have added a new page Ramblings. I say new page but I edited the name and content of 'Desires' mainly because it sounded weird. I gave that page a little makeover too. I decided that it will be my rambling pages, where I get to write crap basically. Things that don't make the cut for my main blog, but is still important enough for me to want to write it. It's nothing serious. I did post a piece over on there today though, I had written it on my main blog a couple months ago but I don't think it's the right content for here, so I never posted it. I talk about clubbing and emotional comedowns, it's not a very chirpy blog post mind.
This post isn't exactly exciting but I am chuffed with my new layout.  I am aiming to try and post every Monday, mainly because I hate Monday's so I am trying this new thing out where I approach things positively. Instead of thinking 'oh fuck it's Monday' I am trying to think 'Yey blog day!!'. We will see how well this turns out!

New Layout & Ramblings

Tuesday, 27 March 2018

Growing up
it is not what I thought it ought to be
I thought I'd age gracefully
not rush through life like a hot mess
I was clearly wrong.

growing up

Tuesday, 27 February 2018



Day through to night her beauty runs wild

Wild with her dreams and hope

Her mind hollow and sorrowful

But the moon is her calling

The moon she looks up

The moon is the life ahead of her

And the stars her guide for when things are dark

Stars that are her friends afar but close to her heart

For when night falls she must not be afraid


For the night with the stars will protect her

And keep her youth young and pure

For she is the wolf

Powerful and beautiful 

Leading her own pack

Because no one can take anything from her...

Wolf Anna

Wednesday, 14 February 2018

Liberty 


Liberty is our destiny 

Yet why are there souls still caged 

Poverty, war and death 

Please tell me that you’re just as outraged?


Politicians acting like children

Throwing insults like in the playground 

Only the playground is our home 

Threats and fear mongering destroying-

The only place that we know.


How do you expect the younger generations 

To care?

When all you set out to do is humiliate and scare

Treating each other like inferiors

No wonder we refuse to believe-

You are the superiors 


What happened to being kind?

Violence, spats and war

Cold countries, homeless on the street

Where is their peace of mind?

When all you care about it your reputation 

Refusing to defeat starvation.





This is my recent poem I’ve been working on! I’m hoping to perform this as well as some others at the next Shine So Hard Poetry night! Keep an eye out for the video!

Liberty

Saturday, 27 January 2018

Pebbles

Rough, Rigged and Rocky- an expanse of sand or pebbles along a shore. Every beach I have ever walked along filled me with serene happiness. The pads of my feet meeting silk sand whilst my worries washed away with the waves. I had always loved beaches, most of my fond childhood memories were set at the beach-  being chased by seagulls laughing until tears were as defined as the sand that coated my chips. I haven’t walked along this beach for 5 years, to this day. Here I am, stepping onto cold pebbles that unnerve my soul. Each step like ice to my chest. The sea haunts me, its screams flickering harshly against the pier. The pier that taunts my nightmares and shattered my whole being.
Allow me to take you back, to the first time my life altered forever. Nine years ago, I fell in love. I had just graduated from University, I got a first in my degree. I was hopeful and ready for the world to unleash itself upon me. As a naive northern twenty-one-year-old, I assumed I had mapped my life out before me. I was ready to roar in the industry I had finished my degree in; business, ready to make millions and be the next self-made Sara Blakely- only without the restricting material- I left my hometown and went down south. To Brighton to be exact. I found a nice little one-bedroom apartment, almost on the seafront. I say almost because I can see the sea from my window, alongside a rubbish tip. But, nonetheless, the stench could not overpower my eagerness.
A professor from my degree put me in touch with a small-time business, who were eager to hire graduates. I attended an interview, smartly dressed with bravery on a broach and wisdom around my chest like a sachet. That day I did not get the job but I did get the number of the male assistant who followed the boss around. This is where life took me in a whirl, to pay rent I started working in a  bar. The office guy who gave me his number kept trying to make a date with me but I had always been too busy to make the time for him.
One night he wandered into the bar, I remember his face beaming at me to finally see me again- and it was purely an accident. I was still busy but every other night he would come back to the bar just to sit and talk to me. He was my distraction from the drunk men ogling at me and the abuse that was hailed at me often. It was two weeks into this when I finally agreed to let him take me on a date. I didn’t want anything acentric so we walked along these very pebbles eating fish and chips as the sun began to fall asleep. All of the most significant moments in our relationship took place on Brighton beach, it is where it all began. It is where it all ended.

____

In the introduction week of University we were asked to write a 500 word piece of prose, we were allowed to write any genre as long as it was set in Brighton. So I came up with this little fiction piece,w hich essentially would be an opening chapter to a novel. 

500 Words of Prose

Tuesday, 24 October 2017

Aloha!!

As promised here is my Uni post! However, due to there being a lot of content and things to write about I have decided to section things. This way you aren't scrolling down forever plus I have limited free time due to studying. So this post will be about moving to University, how I'm coping and meeting my flatmates and what not- the basics and the beginning. I shall be doing a few Uni posts in the future about different topics such as: Making my room my own, Night Life, Lectures and Seminar tips and just how I am dealing with everything. I may even make Uni posts a weekly thing and my other content just whenever I feel like it. So, let's begin.

Newcastle Central Station
23rd of September I moved to Brighton. At 04:45AM I sobbed farewells to my family and set off down South. After 6 and a half hours of traveling,  a change over in London I arrived at Brighton station, feeling overwhelmed and excited to the core. This was the first time being in the city on my own. I had previously been here with my mother so it was bizarre to be lugging a case figuring out my next step.

I say lugging a case because that's all I came up with, a huge heavy ass case and a bulging backpack. I did this journey alone because for a long time I have had this need to be independent. I was sobbing on the train but decided to spend the majority of my train journey between small naps, drinking hot chocolate and reading a book.

I couldn't pack my entire 19 years of life into a single case so back home I packed everything and got everything I had missed delivered down to me- which has been mighty convenient. Plus I love that feeling of knowing you have a delivery on its way- extremely satisfying. My family is the best! Being so supportive and patient with me- thanks parents for sending my belongings down and surprises!


London was busy, like always. I love London but it's just so rushed. You never get the chance to absorb your surroundings. I was worried when I arrived in London, I had no clue where I was or where to go next. Google Maps- always the answer. To be fair, I was only at Kingross and needed to get to St Pancras International- it is literally around the corner. It was definitely a dumb moment on my part.

From Brighton station, I got into a taxi to my accommodation campus Varley Park. The driver was lovely and advised me on taxi services and student nights out. He essentially was the first person I talked to upon my arrival.

As soon as I had arrived I got my keys, this was very exciting. Into the flat I moved, I met my housemates one by one at various times through the day. I was worried about this-  but I really shouldn't have been. Almost two weeks later and I feel like I have known my 4 flatmates my entire life- they're funny, crazy, slightly alcoholic but most of all the best flatmates  I could have ever asked for. However, we do have some communication issues. Mainly because I am a northerner. There has been a couple of times where what I've said has been mistaken for something else. Last week I offered a flatmate a can of dark fruits- they thought I said dog food. I still laugh at this. The other day, I got a delivery with my hulk (teddy) and I've been excited about it the whole week. I showed him to my flatmates in our group chat, and well. For the entire week, they thought I'd been saying 'hug' they just assumed I named a stuffed animal hug.

I love my room, I am excited to show you guys the transformation.


The first week was crazy, nights out, attending introductory lectures. I think the first week was hard on me, by the weekend I had homesickness swelling in my heart. Every time I FaceTime a family member I come off the phone almost sobbing. I miss Kara, my niece, especially. I miss taking her to nursery, and picking her up. Reading her books before sleeping, and having lazy days watching Moana and Trollz on repeat. I miss her waking me up every morning, just because she wanted to see me. It's strange going from seeing someone every day to literally not being able to see them until December.

I am not as homesick now, but little things make me miss home. Like the other night, we had crumble for pudding, and it instantly made me miss my dad. He makes the best homemade rhubarb crumble known to mankind. Sleeping is still uneasy on me, the first night I slept so much but that was due to exhaustion of traveling and since it's been a few hours here and there. I sleep better through the day than at night. My wonderful mother has sent up my hulk, you will probably see him in the photographs on the next Uni post. He smells of home and he's good to cuddle. My mother also sent up a huge wool blanket she knitted, especially for Uni. I love it so much, I think I would be a mess and even more homesick without it. A little piece of home with me.

I have always known I wanted to move away from home, and I have always anticipated it as this great big adventure, which it is, I just didn't give it a thought about how much I'd actually miss home. I don't regret my decisions, I am excited about the future and I love University. I just think it will take some time to get used to.

Until next week!

The Move ((University))

Saturday, 7 October 2017

I did a piece about my recent publication rejection over on Angela's blog, check it out!

Also follow her blog, very useful as well entertaining for writers, I no doubt will be reading it daily like the gospel! 



#SUMMERBLOGGIN

Rejection

Friday, 18 August 2017

This Summer has been weird. So far, at least. I have been anticipating results day which is exactly 5 days away. It is difficult to enjoy your time off when you have the nagging worried feeling in your chest that you may have messed up your chance to go to Uni in September - fun right? Despite my wonderful friends and family showing me their endless support I of course still have plenty of doubt.
At the beginning of Summer, I roughly had a plan of things to do, which is still coming along nicely. I have been to gigs, nights out, seeing friends, even did a photo shoot (will post pictures later in the week) and I have been writing a novel. It is early days but I am quite happy with how it is coming along nicely-  I will post more details in the months to come. I have also been obsessed with Celebrity Big  Brother this year. I never watch it but as soon as I heard that Trisha Paytas (my favourite Youtuber) was going on, I have not missed an episode. I am living for her and the show.
Despite, results day dawning upon us next week I am still excited for the weeks ahead. My last shift at work is in 17 days and in 18 days I am away to Spain for two weeks. And then, hopefully, results day goes well I will be moving to Brighton in 43 days.
This Summer me and my best friend Olivia have put down a deposit for a holiday next Summer - eleven days in EGPYT!! Excited would be an understatement. I will be blogging both on my holidays Spain this year and Egypt next year, may even do some video stuff - so keep eyes peeled. 
There will be more Uni content after results day so hacks and advice and naturally my experiences to come! 


#SUMMERBLOGGIN

Summer Update

Friday, 11 August 2017

Two nights ago  I went to my best friend's gig at the 02 Academy, he is the guitarist of a band called Holding Out. The show was the best night of my life. The opening bands were joyous, I danced with my best friends and got drunk.
First, I met with Olivia. We went for food and then went for drinks in the Dog and Parrot. Naturally, as pint was in order before the gig.
I had been hyped for the gig for months, last week I met with the guitarist Jason to pick them up. He is in incredible, such a talented guy who I am proud to call my best friend.
The show was so personal and it was amazing watching my best friend do his thing.













It was last year when I went to one of his first gigs in Jumpin Jacks, a little space above a bar. And this week I got to see him and his band perform at the O2 Academy - this is surreal and insane.

The vibes were incredible, good guests and the crowd was so alive. It was such a positive energy bouncing between bodies, it was a night I definitely needed. Naturally, a lot of my college friends attended. The band is quite known in my sixth form, so it was good to see some friendly faces I hadn't seen since exams.

Holding Out have their EP on Spotify, please check it out. My personal favourite songs from the EP are Swing for the Fences and Plain Sailing, it was surreal singing along in the crowd. Jason, he has worked so hard on the EP. He himself produced the entire thing, and he did an amazing job. I am so proud of him. His bandmates were incredible too, on their top form. Ellis' vocals impressive as always, Charlie and his energetic vibes on bass, the concentration from Ryan the drummer and Jason smashed it with his incredible guitar solos!



Holding Out

Sunday, 2 July 2017

It's the hot cloud blackening a clear blue sky, it's the cool air turning toxic thick as it wraps its paws around a throat. It's chocking till a person is on the floor withering in a panic. It's the swelling of the world becoming too big for a minute soul. It's watching a clock but seeing only  fate come closer, the numbers yelling guilt as the hands bang against a chest like a  viscious trombone. It's only seeing selfishness without the selflessness behind it.

It's like dipping a toe into a blue lagoon that shimmers  with its reflection from above. It's wanting to run into the wild fields and keep running. It's also wanting to fully immerse yourself into the holy water that you know you will only taint. It's a magnet, both attracting and repelling. It's the sun blaring kindness but your soul bounding you sorrowfully to the squelching mud beneath you.

It's running fearlessy into a maze only to be imprisoned in tears between four walls. It's staring into a mirror and not knowing who is looking back. It's sitting under a hollow tree, finding comfort in the balcony of leaves above. It's  not wanting to leave but having to go. It's like walking onto an empty road, not knowing to turn right or left or wait for someone else who is on the same journey to ask them. It's being free but being trapped by your surroundings. Invisible chains disguised as specks of dust.

It's running into the distance till breathing is the only surrounding sound. It's twirling until the ground beneath is an unsteady pulse. It's a heavy heart on weak shoulders. It's wanting to do everything but being unable to complete nothing.

Rest in Peace Jonny

Grief

Saturday, 24 June 2017

Hello loyal readers!

Firstly, I will begin to say that I apologize for being awol this month. It is exam season, and well life threw me a curveball this month in my personal life. But, I am back in the frame of mind of writing again. This month has perhaps been one of the most difficult in my life so far, but I plowed through focusing on my exams and nothing else. My last exam was yesterday, and it was such a relief to have finally finished A Levels after 3 long years. The pressure to not fuck up has been real, I am not sure how results day will go, some of my exams were tough, but I know not to dwell on them right now. I did my best and it's all out of my hands right now.

To celebrate finishing A Levels with my friends, after my exam we decided to get drunk. Pitchers at the ready of course. It was a nice end to three years.

I want to talk about how it took me three years to finish A-Levels, I am aware it took my longer than a lot of my peers but it was important it took me three years. This time last year I was finishing AS for the second time round, and I've been thinking about my state of mind then compared to now. If I hadn't of messed up my first year and had gone to Uni last September, I honestly do not think I would have been ready. I was still worried on where I wanted to go in life, whereas now? I feel more steady, and I know I want to do English and going into the publishing industry. It took me the last year or so to discover myself, I know what I want and where I want to go. I have learned a lot about myself due to taking that extra year to complete A Levels. I am glad I messed up my first year, I would not be the person I am today without it.

I  want to say that. it is okay to fuck up. We all do it, you just have to learn from your mistakes and try again. It might take you longer to get to the place you want to be, you friends may even be ahead of you, but that is okay. You are doing this for yourself, and no one else.  Do it at your own pace, and just keep going, you will get exactly where you are meant to be, even if like myself it takes an extra year. You have got this.

I started my first day of summer with a good eleven and a half hours sleep, it was perfect not having to wake up for an alarm. I am quite optimistic about this Summer. The Summer before university. So far I have a gig planned, a cinema screening of a friend's film, a party to go to, pride, holiday to Spain and my best friend from Manchester is visiting so no doubt we will be up to many adventures. Those are the set in stone plans, no doubt there will be many more spontaneous plans on the cards. I also plan on writing a book, or begin to, this Summer. I am continuing a piece I did for my English Coursework, it is historic fiction, I will do a post on it with more detail another time!

Expect more summer posts. for example, I am shopping for holiday clothes this week so I may do a little holiday haul for you!



Summer Begins

Wednesday, 21 June 2017

I am back and it's the new year and we are already five days in. As you may or may not have noticed I have not continued my daily posts into the new year. I have been giving it much thought, and I am going to be honest with you guys; last year when I was trying so hard to post daily and catch up with missed days at times I was not posting the best content.
 I'm not saying everything I posted wasn't at a high standard because some of the posts I made last year have god honest been some of my best work.  In the last few months of 2016 I began to get lazy, posting things that I didn't even care that much about, like my acrostic poems that didn't bare much soul, passion or heart, the three things I put into something I genuinely work hard at.
 I don't want a rerun of last year on my blog. Of course, I am overwhelmed that it reached 10K views, I just want to be posting better content. Content that I enjoy writing, and I don't want to feel obligated to churn out work. I adore my blog, and I want the best for it. I want the writing I do post to be quality and have passion put in. If this means not posting every day then so be it. 
I'm not sticking to an agenda this year, I want to express my thoughts and feelings as well my poetry and writing on here, I want the freedom to post whatever I feel like. I want 2017 to be the best it can be, I want my blog to be at a much higher standard, for you guys and for myself. So expect some change around here, maybe a new layout, more images added to my posts, and much more of my heart into this blog.
I am so excited for the year ahead, it's possibly going to be the most important year of my life, and I want you guys to be a part of that every step. I cannot wait to share my adventurous, goals, experiences and just life with you guys. I wish you all a prosperous 2017, and may the odds be ever in your favour!

Hello 2017

Thursday, 5 January 2017

I have created a new blog! A blog especially for my photography, you can access the new blog in the tab underneath the blog title and alongside Desires. I won't be updating that blog as frequently as I update this one. So far I have one post, which is called Autumnal. Please check it out :) Here's the link in case you get lost

Photographing my heart

Tuesday, 22 November 2016